26th February 1996

This morning I was absolutely appalled. My alarm clock was 4 seconds late. This appalled me so much so that I took the clock outside and burnt it. My punishment for not buying a suitable alarm clock and wasting time was a short spell on the electrodes, however, I still did not think this was adequate so I went without breakfast to compensate.

My journey to school was disrupted as several drivers did the unspeakable thing, speeding! They were travelling well over 15mph which is absolutely despicable. Naturally, I stopped and took their registration numbers and faxed them to the police station as soon as I finished my school entry routine. This brings me to another matter, being late, which could have been avoided if it were not for those selfish drivers. Although this crime was not my fault I still disciplined myself using the electrodes.

This afternoon the 2:10pm bell was 3 seconds early, however, I corrected this imperfection by detaining the pupils an extra 3 seconds although on the way out of the classroom one of these pupils appallingly stepped out of line by 4cm which completely threw my perfect routine out so I detained this pupil the extra 6 seconds he detained the rest of the class.

My journey home was absolutely perfect I must admit, however, this whole perfect spell was disrupted when I discovered that I had parked my car 2 centimetres to the left which I corrected immediately. The punishment for this crime must be quite severe as it took too long to rectify.

After careful consideration I have decided that this must be a long term punishment; I will go without breakfast for one week, have a 3 second spell on the electrodes twice a day and must go to bed every night 10 minutes earlier for one week also. I am sure this is the right punishment for the crime.

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